bride and groom eloping in Yosemite National Park

Commitment Ceremony

Guide & Ideas | Updated For 2025

We are big fans of couples getting married their way, no matter how it looks! While traditional weddings and elopements are some of the most common ways to celebrate a partnership, there is another type of ceremony that is just as meaningful – commitment ceremonies.

But what is a commitment ceremony and how is it different from a marriage ceremony? Keep reading because we are answering all your questions about commitment ceremonies and sharing everything you need to know to plan one!

What is a Commitment Ceremony?

the modern dictionary definition

A commitment ceremony is a type of ceremony that marks the union of two people without the government being involved. While commitment ceremonies may share similar aspects of a wedding or elopement ceremony, the one main difference is that they are not legally binding. A couple can make promises and commit their lives to each other, but because there is no paperwork, their union will not be recognized by the government.

Why Have a Commitment Ceremony?

reasons to choose a commitment ceremony

Choosing a commitment ceremony is a deeply personal decision. There are many reasons why a couple may choose to have a commitment ceremony ranging from legal to personal to financial and everything in between. Some of the most common reasons we’ve seen couples choose to hold a commitment ceremony are:

REASON

couple saying vows during a mountain top wedding ceremony

They are not able to get married by law

Before marriage equality passed in the U.S., many LGBTQ+ couples did not have the freedom to get legally married. This is still true in many other parts of the world. For these couples, the only option available is a commitment ceremony.

This is the case for polyamorous couples as well. As these relationships are also not recognized by the government, a commitment ceremony is the best way for all parties to celebrate their union and commit their lives to each other.

There are even cases where straight couples may not be able to get married. Whether it’s due to a previous divorce or separation still pending, immigration reasons, or a host of other factors that restrict them from getting legally married, a commitment ceremony can be a way to acknowledge the depth of the relationship as it currently exists.

They may not want to get legally married

Some couples simply do not want to get legally married.

This can be due to a number of reasons ranging from not wanting the government involved in their relationship to not having any religious ties to varying financial reasons and more.

For these couples, having a commitment ceremony simply comes down to a matter of preference.

REASON

STEP

They already are (or soon plan to be) legally married

Some couples want to be legally married (or maybe already are) but also want to hold a commitment ceremony.

We’ve worked with dozens of couples who don’t exchange vows or hold their ceremony on the same day they sign their paperwork. Some couples plan a destination wedding but file the paperwork in their home state or country. Others want to plan their elopement day without the involvement of an officiant or vendors. Others may simply not want to wait until their legal wedding day to commit their lives to each other.

The reality is, you don’t need anyone else to tell you who or how you should love. Commitment ceremonies allow you to take complete control and plan the type of wedding or marriage ceremony YOU want.

How to Plan a Commitment Ceremony

a step-by-step guide

Because a commitment ceremony doesn’t require any legal paperwork, there is a bit more flexibility when planning. Your commitment ceremony can be as extravagant or simple as you’d like. The only thing you truly need to have a commitment ceremony is each other, but if you want to make your commitment ceremony even more special, consider making it a whole experience! Here’s how.

Choose a Location

One of the best things about commitment ceremonies is that they can take place anywhere in the world! When choosing a location, think about what places are meaningful. Do you want to go somewhere you’ve never been or would you rather revisit a special location? What types of activities or experiences do you want to have? The answers to these questions can help you narrow down some location ideas.
Select a Date

Once you’ve chosen a location, you’ll want to select a date for your commitment ceremony. Your date might depend on the location and the best time to visit, or you may want to hold your ceremony on an anniversary or special date. Either way, your photographer can help you choose a date and location that matches your vision.
Decide if You Want to Invite Any Guests

Choosing to invite guests to your commitment ceremony is a unique decision for each couple. Some couples want to keep this experience private while others want to share it with their loved ones. There is no right or wrong way. Just invite those excited to celebrate with you and those you can’t imagine your day without.
Choose What Activities You Want to Include

A commitment ceremony is so much more than exchanging a few words. You can include activities throughout the day to celebrate your union. Activities are a great way to spend quality time with your partner or loved ones while creating new memories that will make your day even more special.
Hire Any Vendors Needed

Depending on what you want your commitment ceremony to look like, you may want to hire a few vendors to help bring your day to life. Some vendors you may want to consider are:
– A photographer and videographer to document the day
– An officiant to help facilitate your ceremony
– A planner to help you oversee all the details
– Florist
– Hair and Makeup Artist
Enjoy Your Special Day

Once your special day arrives, the only thing left to do is live in the moment and enjoy the experience! A commitment ceremony is a special moment in your relationship and even if things don’t go as planned, there is still a lot to celebrate!

Commitment Ceremony Ideas

what to do during your commitment ceremony

There are so many ways to make your commitment ceremony unique. You can include traditional or cultural elements, or come up with some unique ideas of your own. There is no right or wrong way to hold a commitment ceremony and, while the below is not a comprehensive list of commitment ceremony ideas, they are some common ideas that we hope will provide some inspiration.

Hand Fasting

A hand fasting ceremony (also known as tying the knot) is a Celtic tradition in which two people tie their hands together with a ribbon or cord to symbolize their union.

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Tree Planting / Watering

If you love nature or want an eco-friendly ceremony, consider a tree-planting ceremony. Tree planting or watering ceremonies symbolize a couple’s strong foundation because just like the roots of a tree bind together, so does the couple’s love.

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RIng Warming

A ring warming is a beautiful commitment ceremony ritual, especially if you want to involve your guests. In this ceremony, the couple’s rings get passed around to each guest. While your guests hold (aka warm) your ring, they can say a blessing or prayer over you.

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Exchange Vows or Rings

Almost all commitment ceremonies include some type of spoken word or vows. Your vows are your promises to each other and symbolize the commitment you are making to each other which is the whole point of the day. Some couples also choose to exchange rings or some other physical token of their commitment.

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Unity Ceremony

While all of the above examples are types of unity ceremonies, there are still dozens of other ways to celebrate. Other unity ceremony ideas can include candle lighting, unity sand, feet washing, braiding of three cords, or building a cairn, just to name a few.

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faqS ABOUT

COMMITMENT CEREMONIES

A commitment ceremony is about a couple’s promise(s) to each other. While it is not a legally binding marriage, it is still a valid union between two or more people.

Your commitment ceremony can last as long as you want. Ultimately though, it depends on what you include not just in your ceremony, but throughout your entire day. The more guests and activities you include, the more time you will need to set aside.

You can call your ceremony whatever you’d like! You can just call it a wedding ceremony, symbolic ceremony, vow to be together, etc.

Your love deserves to be expressed no matter how that looks. This means you can say whatever you want at your commitment ceremony. Some vow ideas for your commitment ceremony can include:
– Traditional or pre-scripted vows led by an officiant (typically, a repeat-after-me format)
– Custom vows written by the couple
– A combination of the two

Absolutely! If celebrating your union this way is meaningful to you, then nothing else matters.

Yes, you can change your last name at any point in time. However, the process is different from a traditional wedding since you won’t be changing your name at the time of the legal marriage- you’ll have to do it separately with the court.

While a commitment ceremony is a beautiful ritual, it may not be right for everyone. The main disadvantage of a commitment ceremony is that it is not legally binding, so your marriage will not be recognized by the government or law.

Most couples call each other “partner” or “significant other” after their commitment ceremony. You can also come up with your own names, or even use the traditional terms “spouse”, “husband”, or “wife” if you’d like. However, keep in mind that because commitment ceremonies are not legally binding, they will not be your legal spouse.

Yes, commitment ceremonies are almost identical to traditional weddings or elopement ceremonies. The only difference is they are not legally binding.

There are no rules when it comes to a commitment ceremony, meaning you can wear whatever you’d like. You can choose to wear traditional wedding attire, cultural attire, or whatever you feel most comfortable in.

It’s free to have a commitment ceremony, since you don’t need to pay for a marriage license like traditional weddings. However, you may want to buy attire, decorations, photography and videography, and other expenses that go along with typical weddings.

Hey, we’re Savannah & Greg

Elopement Photographers WHO ALSO ELOPED!

We’re a husband and wife team specializing in elopement photography and videography in Colorado. We believe eloping is the best way to get married, so much so that we did it ourselves! We know it can feel overwhelming not knowing where to start, which is why we help couples set a date, pick a location, make a timeline, etc!

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